


Hux Be a Lady

by Polaris



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Anal Sex, Bad Dirty Talk, Comedic Violence, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, Humor, Multi, Oral Sex, Sexswap, Vaginal Sex, Woke up with a vag, fluff and snark, force artifacts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-30
Updated: 2016-06-30
Packaged: 2018-07-19 07:57:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7352590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Polaris/pseuds/Polaris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’ll probably go away on its own,” said Ren, helping himself to another piece of toast in the officers’ mess. </p><p>“No, it will not go away on its own, Ren,” Hux hissed, gripping his fork menacingly. “You are going to make it go away! This is your fault!”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hux Be a Lady

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mob_lake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mob_lake/gifts).



General Hux rolled out of bed with a yawn, silencing his alarm with a sharp slap to the button and stuffing his feet into his slippers. They weren’t regulation; in fact, he wasn’t sure where they came from. Ren had presented them to him several months ago upon his return to the Finalizer from one of his missions. They appeared to be lined with some kind of fur, though Hux had never questioned the source.

They also seemed slightly larger than he remembered. 

Yawning again, he headed for the refresher, reaching half blindly for his toothbrush. He blinked sleepily at his reflection as he brushed, noting with pleasure that he didn’t appear to need to shave this morning. He spit into the sink, rinsed his mouth, and stepped into the shower.

If asked later, he would say that this was the moment he realized something was wrong. However, he would be lying. He’d already washed his hair, face, and chest before reaching between his legs and coming up a bit short.

He froze, hand still on his altered crotch. He carefully felt around, fighting rising panic at the folds he found instead of his cock. His balls were gone too, and that was the last straw. He viciously shut off the water and yanked open the ‘fresher door.

_“REN!”_

\--

“It’ll probably go away on its own,” said Ren, helping himself to another piece of toast in the officers’ mess. He smeared a truly obscene amount of jam on it while Hux watched.

“No, it will not go away on its own, Ren,” he hissed, gripping his fork menacingly. “You are going to make it go away! This is your fault!”

“I didn’t know you were going to take your gloves off,” Ren said, far too reasonably. “You always wear your gloves.” He took a bite of his toast, licking jam off his fingers.

“You’re disgusting,” Hux told him, “and you should have warned me that this artifact had some sort of...abilities!”

Ren blinked those big dark eyes at him. “It wouldn’t have been an issue if you’d left your gloves on like you always do.”

“Do not try to blame this on me!” Hux could feel his face getting hot. He always flushed when angry, it was a weakness about himself he despised. “I had no idea this was even possible, and you need to fix it!”

“The Force is not that simple,” Ren told him. “I can’t just go and fix it without knowing more about what caused it.”

Hux’s eyelid twitched. “So you will learn more about what caused it,” he said in a measured voice, deliberately patient.

Ren scowled. “There’s a new lead for the map to Skywalker. I have to look into that before I handle any personal business.”

Hux leaned forward. “Ren,” he said, carefully enunciating every syllable, “ _I have a vagina._ You are going to fix this for me or I will make you very, very sorry.”

Ren watched him for a moment, clearly calculating the odds of Hux making his life a living hell and weighing them against the lead for his precious map. Hux waited for the gears to turn, suppressing a triumphant smirk when Ren huffed a “fine,” at him.

“Thank you,” said Hux primly, taking a sip of his caf.

“I still think it’ll go away on its own.” Ren insisted.

\--

It did not go away on its own. Hux was relieved to note that his physique hadn’t changed much, aside from his genitals. His uniform fit mostly the same, aside from a distressing amount of room in the front of his trousers. He had no breasts to speak of; Ren had been quick to notice that.

“You’re flat as a board.” 

Hux had turned slowly to face Ren at that comment. “I beg your pardon?”

They were in Hux’s quarters. He’d gone to the bridge as usual that first day, and every day since, but on that first day he’d admitted to himself that he was upset and needed a bit of coddling. 

Why he’d imagined Ren could have provided it was beyond him.

“You don’t look any different with the uniform on,” Ren said, lounging across Hux’s bed in what under other circumstances might have been an enticing way. “I figured you’d have...you know.” He gestured at his chest in a way that was apparently meant to indicate breasts.

“Thank you, Ren, for noticing,” said Hux as scathingly as he could. “I appreciate you drawing attention to it.” He crossed the room for some brandy; drinking heavily might be the only way he was getting through this nightmare.

“It’s just...it’s still you.” Ren sounded, absurdly enough, like he was trying to be sweet. Hux threw back the entire glass he’d poured for himself. He offered Ren nothing.

“Your ass is the same, too.” Ren’s voice so close to his ear startled him; he’d never heard him move. Huge hands settled on his waist, nearly spanning it as Ren pressed against him from behind.

“You can’t be serious,” said Hux flatly.

“What?” Ren had the gall to sound hurt.

“I am not fucking you like this.” Hux turned in his arms, glaring at him. He was more grateful than he would ever admit that he’d kept his height; looking up at Ren like this would have been intolerable.

“Why not?” Ren’s voice had taken on that sly quality he got when he thought he had the upper hand. “I could make it good for you.”

Hux rolled his eyes and shoved out of Ren’s arms. “Now there’s an incentive,” he said acidly. “I’ve told you how much I hate it when you talk like a bad porn holo.”

Ren had the audacity to laugh at him. “You talk like a Corellian whore when we fuck!” 

Hux sniffed. “What I may or may not say in the moment is beside the point.”

“Like when you told me you needed my- how did you say it? Huge hot cock?” Ren was grinning, a big, dopey expression that, when combined with his stupid ears, was absolutely not charming.

“Oh, shut up.” Hux glared at him.

“‘Put it in me, Ren, I need it!’” Ren’s impression of him was terrible. Hux never pitched his voice that high.

“Are you quite finished? I’d like to get some sleep.”

Ren pouted when it became clear that Hux was not going to get into the mood. “Hux. This isn’t a bad thing, you know. It’s not like anyone is going to respect you any less if you’re a woman.”

“And why would they?” Hux gave him a blistering glare.

Ren sighed and pushed a hand through his hair. “Will you feel better if I blow you?” he finally asked after a long moment.

Hux always felt better when Ren blew him. Ren’s mouth was obscene, and watching those full, pink lips stretching around his cock never failed to thrill Hux. “No.” The thought of Ren getting anywhere near his new parts was so disturbing that Hux might never have sex again.

Ren sighed again, huffily. As though he had any right to be upset over this. “Then do you want to cuddle for a little?”

Hux was one of the most powerful figures in the First Order. He was building a weapon capable of destroying multiple planets, commanded the First Order’s flagship, and struck fear into the hearts of Stormtroopers everywhere. “Yes, please,” he mumbled, stepping into Ren’s waiting arms.

\--

Thankfully, Ren was right about one thing. No one seemed to care at all that Hux’s voice now pitched higher when he gave speeches, or that he walked a little differently than before. He was still General Hux, and his people respected him.

It didn’t stop him from being miserable every time he used the toilet and looked down to see his cock missing. 

Ren was due to leave soon; Hux had sent him back to the planet where they’d gotten that damnable Force artifact in the first place. Whether he would let Ren back on the Finalizer without a solution remained to be seen. Part of him- a small, petty part- hoped Ren came back as a woman. He wouldn’t be so calm about the whole thing when he was the one sporting tits and a front hole.

“If I came back as a woman, would you want to fuck me?” Ren's voice came as a quiet intrusion in his ear, the mask pitching his voice low enough to make Hux shiver.

“Get out of my mind, Ren. You’ve the manners of a bantha,” said Hux without looking up from his datapad.

He could feel Ren pouting through the mask. “We haven't fucked since this happened,” he complained.

“Are you _really_ going to do this here?” snapped Hux, finally tearing his attention away from the report he'd been reviewing to glare at Ren. “Has it occurred to you,” he continued, lowering his voice to a hiss, “that I don't particularly enjoy this body?”

“But you're beautiful,” said Ren blankly.

Hux stared at him. “What?”

Ren shifted from one foot to the other. “You're beautiful. Like this. The other way too, but...well.”

Hux was aware that he didn't look his best when his mouth was hanging open. It was still a few moments before he could close it. “Well. Thank you, I suppose.” He adjusted his hat self-consciously.

Ren nodded, shoulders hunching. “I won't fail, Hux.”

“See that you don't.” Hux nodded briskly. He could feel Ren's eyes raking over him. For the first time, it didn't make him cringe.

Ren’s hand twitched at his side as though he was about to touch Hux. He didn't. “Farewell,” he said evenly. Then he vanished into his shuttle.

\--

That night, Hux actually studied his reflection in the mirror after his nightly shower. Ren thought he was beautiful. Hux wanted to see what Ren saw in this new form of his. It was the first time in days he hadn’t let his eyes skip over himself, disconcerted by what he saw.

What he saw, ultimately, was a fine-boned woman with his face and no tits to speak of. He eyed his tiny breasts critically, trying to lift them with his hands and scowling when there really wasn’t enough of a handful to do so. His nipples were bigger, and soft-looking. He brushed a thumb over one, curious to see if they were still sensitive. A jolt of pleasure affirmed that yes, they were. He felt his nipple harden under his fingertips and looked in the mirror again. 

His skin was flushed a bright pink and his nipples were hard. If he didn’t look at his face, the reflection could have been any pretty- if skinny- woman. He wondered if this was what Ren saw when they held each other on the nights when Hux let him stay in his quarters. Ren clearly wanted him like this; it was obvious in the increasingly hungry way his eyes would follow Hux around, watching his ass sway when he walked, putting his big hands all over Hux’s tiny waist. Hux had hated it; it made him feel small and weak. Now, though, the thought of Ren’s huge hands on his body sent a stab of lust through Hux’s belly. 

He let his gaze drift down to his hips, now slightly flared and curved where before they were narrow and angular. The faint trail of hair on his belly had all but vanished, leaving a triangular shaped patch of hair over his groin. He trailed his fingers through it, noting that the texture was the same as before. He’d avoided touching himself here since the changes had happened; aside from brief but necessary washing, he hated the sight of it. But oh, he could feel the throbbing, wet heat between his legs when he thought about Ren touching him here. Hux reached further down, watching in the mirror as he stroked curious fingers over heated skin. He was wet, surprisingly so; his cock never leaked this much, even when Ren had him flat on his back and was fucking him like a jackhammer. The skin was soft and slick beneath his fingertips. He touched softly, exploring this new part of himself with more hesitation than he would ever admit. He’d never been with a woman before; the Academy had had strict rules about fraternization, and more than that, he’d always preferred men. This was the first experience he’d ever had with a woman’s body.

It was thrilling.

He parted his legs a bit more, giving himself room to explore with his fingers. Hux prided himself on being a quick study; it didn’t take him long to find his clitoris and tease it to hardness. It wasn’t so different from a cock, he mused as he stroked over himself with slippery fingers. Smaller, obviously, and far more sensitive than a cock was. He broke out in shivers as his fingers stroked over his clit one more time.

He needed to get on the bed; his legs would give out if he tried to do this in here.

Millicent meowed angrily when he shooed her out of his sleeping area and shut the door firmly on her. Ren always laughed at him for locking the cat out when they fucked, but Ren had never turned his head in the middle of a fantastic wank session to see green eyes staring back avidly at him. Hux hadn't had his cock soften so quickly since the bad old days at the Academy.

With the cat safely out of sight, he threw himself onto the bed and reached between his legs again, parting them wantonly the way Ren always liked. Gods, thinking about Ren had gotten him so wet, and he let out a truly debauched moan as he rubbed gently over his clit again. He shouldn't have sent him away so soon, not without letting him fuck Hux the way he wanted. Hux worked his clit a little harder, panting a little at the waves of pleasure that rolled over him. He changed the angle a bit, ever the tactician, and made an embarrassing mewling sound at the sensation. His belly tightened as he felt himself getting close, and he closed his eyes, bringing his free hand up to roll his nipple between his fingertips. It was too much; his orgasm washed over him in waves, a full body pleasure the likes of which he'd never experienced before.

Hux lay there, stunned and panting, staring up at the ceiling.

He needed to get Ren back on the ship.

\---

In the four days of Ren's absence, Hux may have masturbated at least twice a day. He would hardly admit to it, though. If pressed, he might concede that his tenacious nature and natural curiosity had driven him to heretofore undiscovered depths of depravity. Who had known the female human body was capable of having eight consecutive orgasms, after all? 

Aside from, presumably, female humans.

\---

When Ren’s Upsilon shuttle docked in the Finalizer’s hangar bay, Hux was waiting for him. He had his datapad in hand and was working through some logistical difficulties the workers were experiencing on Starkiller, but he was not willing to wait any longer for a resolution to his problem.

Even if it seemed slightly less dire with multiple orgasms as a consolation prize for his dick.

Ren stomped off his shuttle with his characteristic strut; Hux thought he looked ridiculous as he swung his helmeted head around before fixing on Hux and storming over to him. Outstretched in his arms was-

“You brought it back with you?” Hux demanded, his lip curling in distaste. He took a step back from the small stone artifact which had caused all the trouble in the first place.

“I had to. It was the only way I could study it more,” said Ren. “Are you pleased?”

“Pleased? To have that thing on my ship?” Hux tore his gaze away from the artifact to glare at Ren. “No, Ren, I am not pleased!”

Ren was quiet for a moment, and when he spoke, Hux could hear the disappointment in his voice. “I did everything I could on the planet’s surface,” he said earnestly. “The records in the temple indicated that bringing the person affected together with the artifact would have an effect.”

“Forgive me if I’m not reassured by that, Ren. I remember the last effect that thing had on me!”

“Hux.” Ren’s voice washed over him, a low, soothing sound. It made Hux remember this morning, when he’d thought about Ren while he rode his fingers. 

Hux could tell the exact moment Ren picked up on that stray thought; his whole body tensed like a predator sensing blood.

“Why, General,” he said slyly, his grin evident even through the mask. “Did you miss me?”

Hux snarled at him.

\---

His- frankly justified- rage at having the artifact on board did not, however, stop him from letting Ren into his rooms at the end of his shift. He poured himself a drink as the imbecile stomped in as though he owned the place, crouching down to pet Millicent as she wound around his legs, meowing loudly to show how much she’d missed him.

Traitorous cat.

He took a sip of brandy as he watched Ren scoop the cat up, petting her belly and getting orange hair all over his black robes. “You look ridiculous,” he informed Ren, determinedly not charmed by the sounds of Ren cooing at his cat through the voice distorter in his helmet.

Ren looked up at him, setting the cat down to pull off his helmet. She darted away and disappeared under a chair. Ren glanced after her, then settled his helmet on the table and stepped toward Hux. 

“You missed me,” he said happily, pressing Hux against the wall and nuzzling his hair. 

“Yes, yes,” Hux muttered, tucking his face into Ren’s chest. He had a ridiculous chest; his tits were bigger than Hux’s. 

Ren stroked his hair, combing his long fingers through the strands with more gentleness than most would credit him with. Hux grumbled but allowed it, tilting his head to give Ren better access. His glass of brandy dangled at his side; he stretched out an arm to put it down on the table before he got distracted and dropped it.

“And you’ve been busy during my absence,” Ren murmured, stroking a hand down Hux’s back just like he would pet Millicent. Hux resisted the urge to arch into the touch, but barely.

“I may have decided to see if there were any perks to being trapped in this form, yes,” he sniffed, biting at Ren’s clothed chest. It wouldn’t hurt, but it might distract him enough to shut him up.

No luck. “You touched yourself here, in your bed, thinking about fucking me,” Ren whispered, cupping Hux’s admittedly tiny ass and squeezing. 

The noise Hux made could generously be called a ‘meep.’ He shoved his hips back into Ren’s hand and growled, “I wish you would stop trying to talk dirty. We’ve discussed this.”

“You like it.” Ren grinned down at him. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed.” His hand was stroking softly over Hux’s ass, making Hux squirm in an undignified way.

“Shut up and touch me,” he snapped, glaring up into Ren’s idiotic face.

Ren laughed and gave a frankly appalling salute. “Yes, General,” he said, smirking as he peeled away his numerous layers. He flung his clothes onto the floor, a disgusting habit which Hux had tried, unsuccessfully, to rid him of.

“You’re picking those up later,” Hux snapped as Ren picked up up; he grunted and dug his heels into Ren’s ass in retaliation.

Ren didn’t seem to mind, nipping at Hux’s ear and squeezing his ass with a happy sound. “I’m so glad you’re letting me do this,” he murmured, breath tickling Hux’s ear. He carried Hux into the bedroom, barely straining. “You look so good like this, Hux. So delicate.”

“I am not delicate.” Hux bit down on Ren’s shoulder to drive the point home. Ren’s hiss of pain was intensely gratifying.

His low chuckle a moment later was less so. “Yes, yes. I know my kitten has claws and teeth.”

“I’ve asked you not to call me that,” said Hux breathlessly as Ren dumped him onto his bed and knelt to begin taking off his boots.

“You also ask me not to talk dirty to you when we fuck, but it makes you come harder when I do.” Ren glanced up at him slyly, peeling Hux’s sock off and pressing his thumb into the arch of his foot. “I can feel how hard you clench around my cock when I whisper filth in your ear.”

Hux groaned. “You sound so stupid,” he bit out as Ren tossed his other sock over his shoulder and smoothed his hands up Hux’s legs, parting them. “Bad porn talk is completely undignified...”

“And what’s dignified about sex?” asked Ren, grinning as he bent to nuzzle the front of Hux’s pants. Hux gasped, hands clutching at Ren’s shoulders. “Hm? Do you think you look dignified when you bounce on my dick? Or that I care what I look like when I’m eating your ass?”

“I hate that phrase,” Hux ground out while trying to grind his hips into Ren’s face.

Ren laughed. “You hate everything,” he said as he undid the flies of Hux’s pants. He pulled them down his legs and sat back, admiring the view.

Hux became very aware that he had not shaved his legs as a woman would, and that he was wearing briefs designed to fit a cock in them. They were depressingly baggy in the front.

“You’re gorgeous,” Ren whispered reverently, crawling up the bed to kiss Hux. Hux made a needy sound into his mouth and wrapped his arms around his neck. He kissed back deeply, forgetting all the reasons he was supposed to be annoyed with Ren right now. Ren’s tongue stroking the roof of his mouth was compensation for the nonsense that usually poured out of his mouth.

Ren brought up a big hand to cup Hux’s face. His palm was hot and clammy, but Hux pushed into the touch anyway, needing Ren’s hands on him. Ren rumbled into the kiss, sucking on Hux’s lower lip before pulling away. Hux was left slightly out of breath.

“I may have missed you,” he conceded, licking his lips.

Ren smiled goofily. “I know.” He began plucking at the buttons on Hux’s tunic, cheerfully working his way down and pushing at the fabric to get it off Hux. 

“Stop that, it’ll wrinkle.” Hux sat up irritably and pushed at Ren until he let him up to go hang up the jacket. He stripped off the undershirt and regulation briefs and turned around to find Ren spread out on his bed, staring at him hungrily.

He cleared his throat self-consciously, shuffling back to the bed. As soon as he was within reach Ren grabbed for him, pulling Hux on top of him and sliding his arms around his waist. Hux let out a soft sound at the feel of Ren's glorious skin pressed against his. It felt different with breasts, as small as his were. He gave into the urge to squirm, rubbing their chests together and luxuriating in the delicious slide of it. Ren's hands anchored him perfectly, one squeezing his waist and the other resting just above the swell of his ass. As Ren trailed his lips along Hux's jaw, that hand slid down to pet his ass, teasing wickedly along the sensitive crease where ass met thigh. Hux kissed him again and whined into Ren's mouth.

Ren chuckled into the kiss, a deep, masculine sound that made Hux's gut twist with lust. “You like that, kitten?” he murmured, breaking away to nip at Hux's ear. 

Hux may have been panting; he would admit to nothing. “Do you actually plan on doing anything, Ren? Or were you intending to tease me until I throw you out and take care of myself?”

“I'd love to watch you touch yourself,” said Ren with that embarrassing sincerity he sometimes displayed. “Not now, though.” And with that he rolled over, trapping Hux underneath his greater bulk in a way that was definitely not appealing.

Hux struggled as a matter of course, writhing underneath Ren’s muscular body just to feel Ren press him down into the bed. “Ugh. You're heavy,” he complained, settling against the pillows.

Ren petted him with long, soothing strokes along his sides. Hux's shiver made him grin. “I know. And I'm gonna hold you down like this when I fuck you. You're gonna love it, kitten. I'll grab your wrists and keep you from using those claws on me.” He punctuated his ludicrous statement with a roll his his hips that pressed his erection against Hux's thigh.

Hux shuddered, arching up and parting his legs to let Ren settle between them. “You can try.”

Ren's grin was feral as he began to slide down Hux's body, pressing slow, maddening kisses to his throat and breasts. He paused to tongue at Hux's nipple, drawing a loud gasp, and glanced up. “Don't worry. I know just how to get the fight out of you.”

“Don't be ridiculous,” Hux panted, arching his chest so Ren could move to his other nipple. Ren had threatened many times to see whether he could make Hux come just by playing with his nipples. As wet as Hux was right now, he wondered if it was possible. 

Ren ran his lips softly back and forth over Hux's nipple until he broke with a moan. “You look so pretty right now,” he purred. “I just want to eat you up.”

“Clever,” said Hux flatly, rolling his eyes. “I had no idea that was where you were headed.”

Ren pouted. “Say you want me to,” he told Hux, sliding further down and gently parting Hux's legs.

Hux flushed, halfheartedly trying to close his legs as Ren's big hands spread them wider. Ren was staring at him with an awed hunger that Hux was torn between finding uncomfortable and arousing. “Don't stare,” he said, squirming.

Ren leaned closer; Hux could feel his hot breath on his cunt. He fought down a shudder, closing his eyes so he didn't have to watch Ren stare at him.

“Look at that pussy,” Ren cooed. “So pink and soft and wet for me...”

“Can you _please_ shut up?” Hux gritted out between clenched teeth. He was throbbing with want; Ren needed to touch him.

“And you still have such pretty red hair down here.” Ren petted his pubic hair, stroking it like Millicent’s fur. “So soft...”

“I'm going to throw you out if you say one more word about my pubic hair,” Hux growled.

Ren ignored him, as he so often did when he was set on being obnoxious. “I can see how hard you are for me,” he told Hux, spreading him out further. The rush of cool air over his clit made him shiver. “There you are. It's so pretty, Hux. So tiny and slick. It would feel so good in my mouth...”

“You're welcome to get on with it,” Hux panted. Gods help him, having Ren stare at him like this was turning him on, in spite of the inane commentary.

“No,” Ren told him. “You have to say it, Hux. I want to hear you tell me to.” His voice dropped to a husky whisper. “I love it when you get so desperate for me that you lose all your shame and start to talk like a whore.”

Hux growled. “At this rate you’ll be lucky if I-”

Ren leaned down and slurped over his clit, once.

“-Fuuuuck,” Hux moaned, arching off the bed. “Keep going, damn you!”

“What was that, kitten?” He could hear Ren grinning. “You want me to lick that pretty little pussy until you come on my face?”

Hux moaned, spreading his legs wider. “What do I have to say to get you to stop fucking talking?” He canted his hips up, fighting back a whine.

“You know exactly what to say,” purred Ren, leaning down and breathing hot over Hux's cunt. Hux made a humiliating, needy sound and bucked up. Ren gave in for a moment, closing his lips over Hux's clit and tonguing him enthusiastically. 

Hux wailed, hands flying down to clutch at Ren's back. “Ren- _Ren!_ Don't stop, please!” 

Ren pulled back, drawing a sob from Hux. He grinned as Hux snarled at him.

“You miserable bastard,” he panted. “Get back down there this instant!” He grabbed Ren's hair, pushing his face between his legs. “You lick my cunt until I come in your mouth twice or I'll not let your cock anywhere near me!”

Ren moaned happily and got to work, his big hands pulling Hux's legs up over his shoulders as he buried his face in Hux's cunt. He pushed his tongue into him, tasting, and then moved up to his clit again, rubbing the flat of his tongue over it in a way that had Hux moaning shamelessly. He was barely aware of the filth he was babbling as he clutched at Ren's hair.

“Yes, Ren, just there, oh Gods, yes. Suck it now, use that whore mouth of yours. It feels so good when you- _oh!_ Like that!” Hux looked down, watching Ren between his legs. “Gods, look at you. You're no better than a dog, licking away at whatever I give you.”

Ren raised his eyes, meeting Hux's gaze. As Hux watched, he gave his clit a slow, hard suck and lapped at it messily. His own hips were undulating against the bed, clearly rubbing his cock on the sheets.

Hux's head fell back with a moan. “You’re getting off on this, aren't you,” he groaned, rocking his hips to match Ren's rhythm. “Of course you are, look at how greedy you are for it, rubbing yourself off. You filthy thing, your face is all wet with me, isn't it? Don't you dare come, I want your cock nice and hard so you can fuck me with it...”

Ren moaned, sliding his hand from Hux's thigh to his cunt. He pushed a finger into Hux, crooking it up as he tongued eagerly at Hux's clit.

“Oh fuck,” Hux sobbed, feeling his orgasm building. “I'm going to come, Ren, so don't you stop, don't you dare stop, I'm- _oh!_ ” He was shaking; he never shook like this when he'd had his cock. The orgasms he'd had on his own paled next to the one Ren wrung out of him. He wailed, bucking into Ren's mouth as Ren _kept going_ , keeping him from coming down off his high; it was too much, he couldn't stand it, but he could already feel himself getting close again. 

Hux was beyond words now, just making desperate, needy noises as Ren pulled another orgasm out of him with his mouth. He licked Hux through it, gentling him with soft licks that made Hux jerk, oversensitive.

After what felt like a blissful eternity, Ren sat up. His face shone in the low light. 

“I'm going to fuck you now,” he said, crawling up to cover Hux with his body again.

“Yes,” Hux agreed weakly, reaching for him. “Inside me, please. I need it, Ren...”

Ren lined his cock up and slowly pushed inside. The stretch of it was immense; Hux made a throaty noise at the burn. It was so good, better than his fingers had been. Hux refused to dignify Ren's assertion that he was a size queen with a response, but he loved the feeling of being split open on a big cock.

“Gods, Hux,” Ren whispered roughly, burying his face in Hux's neck. “You're so tight and wet for me...”

“Move, Ren,” whimpered Hux, winding his legs around Ren's waist. He pulled Ren down into a kiss, tasting himself on Ren's tongue and moaning helplessly at the sharp, tangy flavor.

Ren began to move in short, slow thrusts. He licked into Hux's mouth as he began to speed up, letting out soft, needy sounds as his hips pumped.

“You feel so good,” he whispered. “So good. Wanna stay inside you forever, keep you here just like this, spread out and wet for me. You were made for this, Hux.”

Hux clutched at Ren's shoulder with one hand, biting gently at his ear as he trailed the other down Ren's back. “You too, Ren. You feel so good too. You were so good for me before, even if you are a teasing little bastard. Are you going to come inside me?”

“Yes,” Ren moaned before letting out a yelp as Hux slid a finger between his asscheeks and petted it over Ren's hole. “Oh fuck, you're nasty.”

“You love it,” said Hux knowingly, pushing the tip inside of Ren. “Be a good boy and come inside me. I want you dripping down my thighs. Should I make you clean it up with your mouth, you filthy thing? Would you like that?”

 _"Hux!_ " Ren's thrusts were becoming erratic, his rhythm faltering. 

“Come for me, Ren,” Hux murmured, clenching his cunt around Ren as he pushed his finger deeper in. Ren responded with a feral snarl and stilled; Hux could feel him coming. 

Ren kept fucking him for a few moments more before he collapsed, rolling to the side to avoid crushing Hux. “Holy shit,” he panted, pushing his dark hair out of his face.

Hux stretched luxuriously, feeling sated. “Indeed,” he responded primly.

“We're doing this all the time now,” Ren informed him.

\---

“Have you ever done that before?” Hux asked two rounds later as they lay tangled together in his bed, on the edge of sleep.

“Done what?” Ren mumbled, cracking one dark eye open to look at him.

Hux flushed for what was probably the hundredth time that day, “What you did, earlier.”

“Hux, I have blown you in every supply closet on this ship,” Ren chuckled. Hux wanted to blast himself. 

“You know what I mean, you overgrown child.” Hux rolled away to his own side of the bed.

Ren grabbed Hux’s arm and tugged him back across his chest, “I told you I could make it good for you,” he said into his hair. 

Hux quickly swallowed down an absurd flash of jealousy. “Just go to sleep, Ren.”

Ren turned Hux's face to kiss him. “Enough of that, kitten,” he said softly. “There's no one but you.”

“Get out of my head,” Hux mumbled sleepily, settling against Ren’s chest.

\---

“So what does that thrice-damned thing actually do, besides making my cock disappear?” Hux finally snapped as he watched Ren stare at the artifact.

Ren had been staring at the thing for almost forty-five minutes, by Hux’s count. He’d kept his ridiculous Jedi posture, legs crossed, hands on thighs. He occasionally squinted, or pursed his lips. Once he’d scratched his nose.

Now he blinked and looked at Hux as though startled. “Did you know that the planet we got this from was a Jedi sanctuary?” he asked, apropos of nothing.

“No, Ren, why would I know that?” Hux rubbed at his temples. “More importantly, what does it have to do with anything?”

“The sanctuary was formed during a time of great trouble,” Ren murmured, gazing at the object; Hux might as well not even have been there. “Force users were being hunted and killed in this part of the galaxy. They needed to rebuild their numbers in a safe place...”

Hux suddenly had a very bad feeling about this.

“Only men settled on that planet, so they communed with the Force to make sure they could conceive,” Ren continued, as though he wasn’t discussing Hux’s suddenly altered fertility.

“Ren,” he said loudly, pulling Ren from his strange trancelike state, “what do you mean by conceive?”

“Well, you’re female now, so in theory you could bear children,” Ren explained.

“Is that how it works?” asked Hux in a falsely innocent voice. “Why thank you, Ren, I had always wondered about the basics of human reproduction. Females can bear children, imagine that!”

 

Ren scowled. “What I mean is that the Force enabled people in a single-sex environment to change sex for reproductive purposes. Somehow the Jedi who settled there managed to harness that power into this artifact, and when you touched it...”

“Yes, yes,” said Hux, massaging the bridge of his nose. “No females came down to the planet with us.”

“Exactly,” Ren confirmed, looking pleased that Hux had caught on. Hux wanted to hit him. “My Force abilities activated the artifact, and you touched it with your bare skin, so it altered you.”

“Well, now that we’ve established that,” said Hux testily, “how do we figure out how to fix it?”

Ren took a deep breath. “I think,” he said slowly, “that we just have to hope it goes away on its own.”

Hux punched him.

\---

All told, Hux didn’t think he could be held responsible for his actions upon hearing Ren’s less than helpful suggestion. If Ren had had to walk around the ship hiding a black eye under that stupid mask of his...well, that still wasn't as bad as the possibility of conceiving a child.

Hux paused to imagine what his progeny would look like. With Ren as the father, the damned whelp would destroy the universe. He shuddered.

Ren, for his part, was sulking on the far end of the bridge, making a nuisance of himself by breathing down poor Mitaka’s neck.

Mitaka was bearing up remarkably well under the circumstances. He was only sweating a little, in spite of Ren's looming presence at his back.

“Ren, enough!” Hux fought the urge to roll his eyes. “Your lurking is keeping my people from doing their jobs. Please make yourself useful somehow.”

Ren slowly turned toward him. “You know,” he sneered in that snide voice he got when he wanted to be obnoxious, “I have it on good authority that birthing a child is all it would take to restore you to normal.”

The entire bridge went silent. Hux noticed Unamo making a beeline for the doors. Mitaka held his ground, to his credit; Hux would remember that when he came due for a promotion.

Hux felt his spine stiffen. “ _Ren,_ ” he breathed in an absolute fury, “a word, please.” And with that, he stormed toward the doors.

Unamo scurried out of his way. The coward.

He could hear Ren stomping after him, that ridiculous strut of his making his boots echo in the corridor leading off the bridge. He was about to suggest they take this to his office like civilized beings when Ren’s arm shot out, grabbing his elbow. Before he could do more than squawk in protest, he was hauled unceremoniously into a familiar utility closet. Someone had relocated the mops to the far wall, he noticed; clearly it had been too long since Ren had dragged him in here for a quickie.

That said, he was still furious. “How _dare_ you discuss our private concerns in front of my command crew?” he snarled.

“Private?” Ren shot back, pulling his mask off and setting it on a shelf full of toilet paper. “How private can it be when everyone knows you’re female now? They’re all just too afraid of us to mention it!”

“That is hardly the point! I am not having your child! I don’t care if that’s the only way to make this go away! I won’t do it!” Hux resisted the urge to stomp his foot. Barely. It was bad enough that his voice had gone horribly shrill.

“You’d be a terrible mother anyway!” snapped Ren.

Hux stared, feeling irrationally offended. “And you think you would be a good father?” 

Ren opened his mouth, but then shut it again, looking slightly guilty. 

They stood there for a few moments, each perturbed by the direction the conversation had gone.

“...I don’t really think you’d be a bad mother,” Ren offered a moment later.

“Thank you,” said Hux awkwardly.

“I don’t really want a kid either, though,” Ren added quickly.

“Neither do I,” Hux assured him.

Ren’s shoulders slumped. “Oh,” he said. “Good.”

They stood there a bit longer. 

“Hey, since we’re here...” said Ren hopefully.

“You have got to be joking.”

\---

Ren was not joking, and in spite of his better nature Hux still found himself bent over a shelf full of industrial cleaners and paper towels while Ren enthusiastically fucked his ass. Apparently the idiot had simply kept some lubricant in his robe in hopes that Hux would be amenable to a romp in a supply closet.

Which he was, to his eternal shame. 

Anal sex lost some of its appeal without the prostate stimulation, but Hux was pleased at how good the angle Ren had stumbled upon felt. It felt deeper than when Ren was in his cunt, somehow. Getting fucked from behind also allowed Ren to reach one of those huge hands around to play with his clit. 

The only downside was the fact that Ren’s mouth was right next to his ear, and he was muttering garbage under his breath: “That’s right, Hux, I love your tight little ass. Still feels so good, just like always...”

Hux leaned further down on his elbows and generously held back from rolling his eyes. He spread his legs further, giving Ren more room to tease him with. Ren's big fingers felt so good stroking around and over his clit, teasing enough to make him shake but not enough to make him come.

“You’re so wet, Hux, I can feel it running down your legs,” Ren cooed, and Hux tried to repress the shudder that ran through him as Ren thrust in particularly deep. It was true; the feeling of being so open and exposed, of having Ren so deep inside him- and it was so strange, how different the same act felt with different anatomy- it was doing things to him.

Ren gently pinched his clit between his thumb and forefinger, rubbing back and forth. Hux finally gave in and sobbed, shoving his ass back into Ren’s thrusts.

“Make me come, damn you!” he panted, canting his hips into Ren’s touch.

“Yeah, that’s right, come for me, baby,” Ren purred, and one of these days Hux was going to strangle him for his terrible dirty talk. “I wanna feel your pretty ass clench on my cock...”

Hux shuddered, feeling Ren’s cock twitch inside him on a particularly deep thrust, and then he was coming, yowling like a cat in heat as Ren’s fingers tormented his clit. It felt entirely too good; he tried to squirm away, but Ren’s other hand was like a vice on his hip, holding him still as he began to thrust faster. Those terrible, wonderful fingers never left his clit even as Hux writhed, oversensitive, on Ren’s cock. 

“Gonna make you come again,” Ren slurred against his ear, his breath hot and humid. “Wanna feel that again, how tight your ass gets for me. I’m gonna come inside you, Hux, I want my come to drip out of you just like your juices-”

“Don’t- call them juices,” snapped Hux breathlessly. “It’s disgusting.” 

“You’re disgusting,” Ren murmured fondly. “Look at you, squirming on my dick like a good little girl, so wet for me. You gonna come again, kitten? Just for me?”

Hux sobbed through his second orgasm, shuddering as he felt Ren spill inside him with a rumbling groan he could feel vibrating all along where Ren was plastered to his back. The aftershocks had his legs shaking; Ren’s arm sliding around his waist was the only thing keeping him upright.

“Did you just call me a girl?” asked Hux, still breathing hard.

Ren was suspiciously silent.

Hux elbowed him viciously in the side, making Ren yelp and let go of him. The result was less than spectacular, as Ren pulled out quickly enough to make Hux yell in pain, and the lack of support had Hux’s legs crumpling beneath him. He made a grab for the shelf, sending rolls of paper towels raining down on both of them.

The stormtrooper who opened the door to investigate reportedly volunteered herself for reconditioning that very evening.

\---

It had been four weeks to the day since Hux had woken up to discover his cock was missing. Four weeks of his bridge crew politely averting their eyes and pretending not to notice Hux’s different appearance. Four weeks of stormtroopers doing double takes when he passed them for inspections. And it had been three weeks since he and Ren had begun fucking with this new body of his.

Ren was a sex savant, Hux had decided. He’d come to the conclusion one evening as he’d lain across his bed with Ren happily licking his own come out of Hux’s cunt. His overlarge nose had had unexpected benefits, as he’d kept bumping it delightfully against Hux’s clit. The night had ended with Hux pushing him onto his back and riding his face to an extremely enjoyable conclusion.

If anything, their sex life had improved thanks to this strange anomaly that allowed Ren his variety even with the same partner. Hux, for his part, enjoyed the novelty of a new set of sensations he would have otherwise not gotten to experience. That said, he did not relish the idea that this change could be permanent. It was something he tried very hard not to think about.

Hence all the sex with Ren. One could say what they liked about Kylo Ren, but he was very, very good at being distracting.

Still, the fear wiggled in at night, when he had Ren tucked around him and Millicent curled against his other side. There was nothing to distract him then, nothing to keep him from imagining a future in a body that wasn’t right. It was intolerable.

He’d already begun making careful plans in case there was no going back from this. Hux was no fool; he knew of several reputable medical staff who specialized in surgeries of this type. He had a tentative timeline in his head, a countdown of sorts. If a certain amount of time had passed with no improvement, Hux would not count on the Force to take care of this. He had very good medical coverage through the First Order, and his only concern was leaving the Finalizer in Ren’s hands while he recovered. He would be fine, and male, again in no time. He contented himself with this thought when the fear crept in, and pulled the covers over himself at night with a sense of security. He and Ren were being careful, so the worst that could happen to him was menstruation. If female stormtroopers could handle that, so could he. He would simply purchase supplies from the commissary tomorrow.

With that bracing thought, he drifted off to sleep.

\---

General Hux would be the first to confess that he was not fond of mornings. He had, in fact, trained Ren to bring him caf before even attempting to speak if they had spent the night together. Without chemical stimulants, Hux had been known to be at less than peak performance. He had once agreed to let Ren shave Millicent before he’d fully woken up and put a stop to that nonsense.

So it was that he crawled out of bed, shoving his feet into his delightfully furry slippers, and shuffled sleepily into the refresher. He left Ren splayed out in bed with Millicent perched on his head like a little orange cap. If he’d been awake, he probably would have found it charming.

Hux brushed his teeth on autopilot, blinking sleepily at his reflection as he spat into the sink. He idly scratched his cheek, wondering if his skin was getting dry and whether Captain Phasma knew of any creams for that. Another yawn nearly cracked his jaw and made him forget the train of thought. He turned on the water in the shower and stepped in once it had reached an acceptable temperature.

Later, he would swear Ren to secrecy over how long it took him to notice that something had changed. As it was, he had already washed his hair and was lathering up his soap when he finally looked down and registered the presence of his cock, hanging cheerfully between his legs as though it had never been gone. His eyes widened, and he reached down to find that his balls had returned as well. 

_“REN!”_

“What?” came the sleepy reply through the ‘fresher door. “I’m getting your caf, I promise!.”

“It’s back!” Hux jumped out of the shower without a thought to the water dripping all over the floor. He flung open the door and spread his arms in triumph, showing Ren his restored genitalia.

Ren blinked stupidly at him for a second, still brandishing a mug as his first line of defense when confronted with a tired Hux. Then he looked down. 

“My cock is back!” said Hux, overjoyed. He paused when Ren did not show the proper amount of enthusiasm.

Ren looked at his cock, then back at his face. “Well,” he said, “I told you it would go away on its own.”


End file.
